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Show highlights include:

  • The “Secret Ingredient To Success” that lets you enjoy the triumph of financial growth (1:29)
  • Why putting kindness on autopilot cultivates relationships (even if you already love your family and friends) (4:54)
  • How having loyalty breeds love, grace, and mercy for others that prepares your generational wealth (6:27)
  • Why actively listening to others shows them the gratitude they've earned (even if they don't deserve it) (9:15)

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You will know on a scale of 1-10 your Rapid Retire Financial Fitness! After the assessment you'll receive a free copy of my book Paying for College in the 21st Century!

Read Full Transcript

Do you hate the thought of working past 55 or 60? Do you hate not being able to live the life you deserve today? Do you hate not knowing what your financial future looks like? It's time to stop doing what you hate, here's your host, Mr. Harold Green.

(00:20): Lord. Hi everyone. This is Harold Green of Brightree financial group. And it's time to stop doing what you hate. I hope you are having a great day. It's Friday for me, man. We're headed into the weekend and just, you know, looking forward to getting a little R and R taking some time off here and just relaxing a little bit, but I got a good show for you folks today. I'm excited to, to, to be bringing it to you. And something I've been thinking about for a little bit and I wasn't really sure when I was gonna share it, but I think now is the perfect time to do so. And it is one of the, I mean, it's just one of the secret ingredients to success and I'm gonna be talking about a couple of the different secrets to success, but this one, this is the main one.

(01:09):And I think it's one of the hardest ones to pull off because it takes time to develop this muscle. And the name of today's show is gonna be special. K. And I'm not gonna tell you what the case stands for just yet it, but it's gonna be good. So are you ready? Are you ready? 1, 2, 3. Let's get it special. Okay. It was something I was thinking about and I was actually gonna record this show yesterday afternoon or last night when I got back from the driving range. And normally this is where I go to clear my head, hit some ball, work on my game, work on my swing, just to work on things and, you know, just to see what other people are doing with their swing. And not that I'm gonna copy their swing or anything like that, but it's fun to be out there and seeing people just kind of, you know, enjoying learning the game, learning and enjoying the process and maybe, you know, I'll talk to a couple of buddies that I, I see out there every once in a while.

(02:04): And, and it's just fun seeing people and hanging out it's the driving range, it's a cool place, but I want to get into today's show special. K. And I'm gonna start with a book that every time I read this book, I mean, hands down, it's full of this one special ingredient. And of course this is the Bible and I'm gonna go to Proverbs chapter 11 and I'm gonna start in verse 17. And I just love like backing up the things that I share with you folks with actual scriptures and references, because this is where I'm getting this stuff from. You know, a lot of people say, well, I don't believe in that. That's fine, but I, if you say you want something in life and I figured out how to get it, and then I'm gonna tell you how to get it too. And so let's get it Proverbs 11, 17.

(02:59): And it says the merciful kind and generous man benefits himself for his deeds return to bless him. But he who is cruel and callous to the wants of others brings on himself, retribution, man, this is one of the coolest scriptures I've I've ever seen because it says the merciful and generous man benefits himself, right? For his deeds return to bless him. Some people say, oh man, you're just doing that because you're selfish. Well, this is it's, it's the law of reciprocity. You can't get away from this, right? It's like the law of gravity, the law of reciprocity, it's the same thing. And if you wanna be successful, here's the thing. You gotta develop the kindness muscle, the kindness muscle, the kindness muscle, right? You gotta beef up your kindness muscles because this is what it's gonna take. And I'll share with you why, and I'm gonna continue to read on and go down to verse 24.

(04:02): It says there are those who generously scatter abroad and yet increase more. There are those who withhold more than is fitting or what is justly due, but it results only in one, the liberal person shall be enriched. And he who waters shall himself be water. The people curse him who holds back grain when the public needs it, but a blessing from God and man, as a bond ahead of him who sells it, man, this is some powerful stuff. I don't want you to break out a pencil. If you can, if you're driving, listening to this, just kind of think about this. Think about this, right? There are those who generously scatter abroad and yet increase more. The liberal person shall be enriched. And he who waters shall himself be watered? I can't stress this enough. They always say a little kindness goes a very long way.

(05:01): Just a little kindness. Like, you know, when is the last time, then I'm not beating up on anybody, but I'm really passionate about this because this is one of the things that I try to exercise in my life all the time, every single day, I do my best to soak kindness into the lives of others, watering others. In other words, it's like, when is the last time you've you've watered somebody or you've you've gave somebody an encouraging word or you've gave somebody like an encouraging smile. You gave somebody like an encouraging hug or something like that. When is the last time none I'm talking about just the family members, because with family, you do that because you love 'em right. That's automatic, but kindness, kindness is not automatic, right? It's hard to become an automatically kind person because in men's world today, we don't think about things like that.

(05:52): We always thinking about like me, me, myself, and I, me, myself and I, me, myself and I, right? I gotta get better. I'm reading self help books to help myself get better. And one of the things you find in these books is you'll always find things about kindness and doing things for others. You'll because it's one of the ways you help yourself because it says the merciful kind and generous man benefits himself for his deeds return to bless him. Your deeds will come back. We're talking about the law of reciprocity and I'm gonna get a little deep into this because it's extremely important. So kindness is number one. It's the main one. But here's another thing that stems out of being kind loyalty is number two. And I'm gonna go further into proverb, 19 verse 22, that which is desired and a man is loyalty and kindness and is glory and delight are his giving.

(06:53): But a poor man is better than a liar. Oh man, we're gonna talk about lying in a little bit, but loyalty and kindness is what is desired in a man. And so I think about that a lot. And, and I'll just kind of get into this, but I'm gonna tell you straight up, you cannot violate these principles and expect to get anywhere in life. It says loyalty and kindness, right? Not being a trait and someone who's mean in callous and cold. And self-serving for the most part, loyalty and kindness is what is desired in a person. So we got this thing figured out right here. You know, a lot of people say, well, what do you want out of me? What do one outta me? Well, loyalty and kindness to start. You work on those. I mean, you got everything else beat because everything else stems out of loyalty and kindness.

(07:49): Think about everything that you do every single day. You're doing it. I'm saying not about family here. Loyalty. Yeah, family, but also love loyalty comes outta love for your family. You're loyal to your spouse. And we're gonna talk about that. But what is kindness, right? I'm not gonna go into some definition of kindness that I found on the internet. I'm just gonna share with you what I, what I think kindness is. And this is just my opinion. And you folks may have your own, which I'm sure you do, but what is kindness? I think kindness, it's basically a form of grace, grace, mercy, doing something for somebody who they don't even deserve. It is easy to do things for somebody who's done something for you, but it's hard to do something for somebody who ain't done, nothing for you. That's kindness, right there doing something for strangers, people you don't even know.

(08:40): I want you to think about some of the ways you can be kind and just I'm, I'm telling you straight up in your morning, time in your preparation or whatever in your day, people talk about gratitude, gratitude, gratitude, being thankful for things, which is very important. But then I want you to think, how can I be kind today? I'm grateful for this, but how can I build my kindness muscles? Like what are some of the things I can do to be kind? And I want you to like, have kindness at your, your top of conscience, right? Kindness kind. What are some of the ways you can be kind? Number one, I think listening to others and not being caught up in your own world, you know, I, I go to lunch with friends and stuff and I take my cell phone. I put it in my bag and I do my best not to answer it.

(09:27): Just like, turn it off, put it in the bag and then like, just leave it in the bag. It's not even on the, it's not even on table. Why? Because I will want that time to be about our relationship, to be about that person, to be about what it is that they wanna share with me today. Okay. I wanna listen to them. I wanna hear them out. I wanna hear what's going on in their world. I wanna be attentive. It's a way of showing kindness. Like I said before, being kind is doing things for others sometimes who really don't even deserve it. And one of the biggest things I think about all the time is this quickly forgiving others when they mess up or they fall short or they don't come through when they're supposed to, for whatever reason, I think about this and I do my best not to get upset, but I do my best.

(10:16): Respond with a kind answer in a kind way. Why? Because God knows I'm not perfect. God knows I'm gonna mess up. God knows I'm gonna make some mistakes somewhere. But what do I want when I mess up, I want somebody to say, you know what? That's okay. I understand we can move on from this. Let's fix it and let move on. Not get angry at me and be like, I'm gonna get you being vindictive and all that bull crap. But just, I understand. And that's I tell my wife the same thing I say, honey, just chill. You know what? Just chill, cuz we don't know why it happened this way. We can never pass judgment on people. I know why they did this because no, you don't know only God, unless you're there with that person inside their brain, you have no idea why they do the things they do or why things end up the way they end up.

(11:03): So I would say respond with some kindness, soul, some kindness, because again, your deeds are gonna come back to bless you. Your deeds are gonna come back to benefit you. This is one of my favorites because man, like I said, this is what I desire from others. When I make a mistake, it's grace and it's easy to be kind. When you have everything going for you. When you are on top of the world and rising your day is going fantastic, man, you got a pep in your stuff. The birds are singing. It is easy to be kind to other people when you're in a good mood. But what about when you not in a good mood? What about when like, oh hell is breaking loose. Are you gonna start cutting people off in traffic and doing all this crazy stuff that people do? You shouldn't, you should think about being kind as best you can.

(11:58): I know it's hard because it's hard to think about doing something like that for other people when you've got stuff going on for yourself. So kindness and loyalty, the two biggest ingredients to becoming successful. And I wanna talk about loyalty for a second because we live in a world where everybody's speaking their truth. I'm speaking my truth. This is my truth. That's like, I've heard it said a lot. I've heard it said a lot. People say I'm speaking my truth. Anyway, I digress. Loyalty is basically a commitment to a cause or a purpose. It's a strong desire to do right by someone or something. It's a strong desire. And I'm gonna put this out here and it's a little bit mushy, but I tell you guys, I love my clients. I love my lines. I love them. I love them. I love my clients. Not like I love my family, like me know my wife and stuff, but it's a level of love there because there's a level of commitment and there's a level of, of loyalty.

(13:08): And one of my clients were you, they call yesterday and they, they made it a appointment. I hadn't talked to her in a while, but I love this family. I do it. It's cool. And they called and they, and she, she just made an appointment and, and I, I overheard my assistant talking to her and and said, Hey, Hey, trans to me when you get done. So she transferred over and stuff. And we started talking man. And she said, she's Harold. We just want to come in. Cause we wanna retire in two years and we just wanna make sure everything is on track. My husband, he's just, he's had it with his job and man, he's ready to go. I said, great. And we started talking and somehow we got on the topic about like me retiring. Like when am I gonna retire?

(13:53): And I told her, I said, I gotta know the 20 year years to plus to go. And she's like what? I said, yeah. I said, I'm in my forties. And I, I plan on being here for a very long time. And I said, but I'll probably semi-retire and just work with my top, like 100 clients and not be taken on any more people. And I said, because like, if I retire, like what's gonna happen to you, right. If I'm here to take care of you, like what's gonna, if I just say, I mean up and run away, I like, I made enough money. I'm good. My family said, I got everything I want out of this. And now I'm out peace. You know, for me, I think a little bit differently than that. And so I said, you know, here's what I want. Like, because I care about you folks so much.

(14:34): Here's what I want. Like, I want you to be massively set. That's what I'm working towards. And then I want your kids to be massively set. That's what I'm working on. I want your kids to, to get, be in a position where they know everything about what you and I are doing together and like your finances and, and teach them like how to manage things and make sure like whatever we leave behind, like they don't screw it up. They know what's going on. I said, I can't walk away from this thing until I get a couple of generations set. You're set, your kids are set. Your grandkids are set. I've taken care of three generations and maybe even four. And then maybe I can walk away because I, I love my client and I wanna be loyal to them. I wanna make sure they're okay.

(15:14): I'm not selling just the next best financial planning strategy. Right? It's more deeper than that. It's about more than that. And, and I'm gonna go into something that I don't want to talk about, but it's something that I think I gotta put out there because I think it's also a key to why a lot of people are not successful. If you are not making progress in an area, check your loyalty, check your loyalty. Do you have divided allegiance Bible talked about a house divided against itself. Can't stand. Are you being double mind about what you got going on? And honestly, and this is what I don't like to talk about this, but I'm gonna put it out there because I think it's gonna help somebody. I've worked with people who have not been honest with me. And it says a poor man is better than a liar.

(16:11): That one of the things you really gotta think about is your level of honesty, because don't forget about the law reciprocity. Some people think lying is okay, but I'm telling you straight up when you lie and you put that out there in the universe, you're planting that seed and it's gonna come back to you because no seeds get dug up. All seeds that are are sewn will produce some kind of fruit. And guess what you gotta do. If you're producing bad fruit, you gotta chop that tree down and deal with the consequences of that fruit and start planting good seeds. But I've worked with people who have not been honest with me. And how do I deal with that? And I'm gonna be honest with you. This is where I have to have compassion. And I have to use a level of understanding. And when I talk to people about these things, they say, you know, they try to justify it by saying things like, well, I didn't want to hurt your feelings.

(17:04): I, you know, I didn't know how you were gonna feel about this. So I, I hid it from you. And I didn't, I didn't tell you about this. I know you've asked me about this stuff and in our meetings, but I, I didn't wanna hurt you because you know, I wanted to go do this other thing over here, cuz I heard this other thing on this podcast show or friend has something going on over here. So I wanted to put some money over here and see how this and that. And I said, you know what? I'm okay with that. I'm totally okay with that. But you can sit here and tell me you want something and then go start doing all kinds of other stuff. And then don't tell me everything that's going on. You gotta tell him me. If we're gonna have an honest and open relationship, you gotta tell me cuz I I'm not gonna tell you no, don't do something.

(17:42): I'm gonna run the numbers for you. And then you can go off and make whatever decision you want because it's your money. But whatever you bring to me, I'm gonna be loyal to you. I'm not gonna cheat you. I'm not gonna sit here and play games with you. And I don't want people doing that crap with me. Like if you're gonna come work with me, come work with me. And if you wanna put money in other places, I'm okay with that. But don't hide things from me because I'm gonna be 100% honest with you. 100% of the time. It's the fiduciary way. I don't have anything to hide. Nothing to hide. Everything is transparent. If there is something you think I'm hiding, simply ask me about it. And there's probably a reason we didn't talk about it yet. We probably didn't get there yet. Sometimes I can't tell a client everything because they're not ready to handle it.

(18:24): I took out a new client and they're like, oh my God, this is so much information. Like I said, there's a ton more. And I said, here's the thing though. I can't tell you everything right now because you're, I'm, we're building our foundation. And as we go, you're learn more and more and more. If you get ahead of me, that's fine. But don't get ahead of me. And then accuse me of not telling you. That's not the way this works. Some people work faster than others and that's fine, but make sure you circle back to me and let's have a conversation about out these things. When people say stuff like it, I'm not trying to hurt your feelings. What are they getting at? Number one, they, they know that I've given them the best I got in regards to what they asking me for. They know, like I said, I'm loyal.

(19:05): I hit you back. You call me, I hit you back. I don't like leave you hanging out there for three or four days. I hit you back. If I'm busy, I stop what I'm doing. Sometimes because as long as it doesn't infringe on me being loyal to clients, you know, if it's just like admin stuff or whatever, like, you know, I hit my clients back as fast as I can. Sometimes I'll call 'em when I get home. Sometimes I'll call 'em on the weekend. And a lot of my clients have my cell phone number. They know how to get ahold of me if so going down because I'm not that guarded where I have like a moat built around me where people don't have access to me, but people know I've given 'em the best I got in regards to what they asked me for.

(19:40): And if they have some kind of hidden expectation of me, that's unfair. You gotta put your cars on the table and say, this is what I expect. And if I don't get this, then we may have some problems. And then I'll tell you you, whether or not your expectation is real or not. No, I don't think we can do that because that's that expectation is like, it's not real. We gotta set realistic expectations for the relationship and for the process. Number two, I think the actions they took was out of their own fear and it really has nothing to do with me. I've had somebody tell me straight up, like Harold, I love you and everything, but you know, I'm gonna, you know, put some money over here with this person and I'm gonna put some money over here with this person. I'm gonna put some money with you.

(20:24): And because I don't want all my eggs in one basket, I'm like, okay, I understand that. But what if my basket is the best basket? Like I'm not being braggadocious or anything like that. But a lot of times like I've analyzed all of these numbers. I've analyzed all this performance. And a lot of times mine is the best in regards to certain areas and they say, yeah, but you know, they're more conservative over there. So I, you know, I can be conservative too. If you want me to be conservative, I can be conservative too. So what is this? Well, well, what if something happens to you then? You know, then at least I got these people over here. Like what? Like I'm gonna run away with all your money. Is that what that is? No, that's not will happen. It's out of some kind of fear that people have and that's okay.

(21:12): You know how I'll respond to that. I respond to that with kindness and I tell them, okay, that's fine. But you know what? Here's how I roll. Here's what we're gonna do with the money that you bring to me, this is what we going to do. And if you want something different and I can't give it to you, then you work with somebody else, right? Because they have something that you want. They promise you something and hopefully they can deliver on what they promise. But when you and me I'm with you and that's how we roll. And we're loyal to each other. If you wanna see something different than what I got going on, and you want me to try to do something different, don't just have that hidden net expectation of me and then get all mad at me. And then don't tell me, like, you gotta be, as we say in the hood, you gotta be straight up, not straight straight.

(21:55): You gotta be straight up. And we talking like for real, for real, not this fake stuff, kindness and loyalty are the two biggest keys to someone's success. You can have all the other things going on, right? You can be smart. You can be intelligent. You can be hooked up to the max. You gotta, you can know some of the top performing people and have the best networks. But if you're not kind and you're not loyal somewhere, that is gonna bite you in the butt. So I wanted to share these things with you today because I tell you in the world that we live in moving forward, you're gonna have opportunities to be unkind because people straight up, man, it will you off sometimes, but you have to react with a level of kindness and you're gonna have some opportunities to be disloyal. And then you're gonna be justifying the reasons why you want loyal. You cannot violate these principles and expect to get ahead. You've gotta deal with these things, head on with a level of class, with a level of dignity, because that is gonna be the tide that raises your ship. And I'm excited for you to be hearing this because it's gonna take you to a different level. So remember this a little kindness goes a very long way and until next time everybody, 1, 2, 3, let's get it.

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