Have a podcast in 30 days

Without headaches or hassles

Highlights from this episode include:

  • Offline rules that drastically increase the quality of your online interactions (1:31)
  • A simple question you can ask to repel creepy connections (1:54)
  • The secret to never wasting time with random social media contacts (2:06)
  • The single best way to improve the caliber of your social networks (4:38)
Read Full Transcript

Hey, did you know that if you like this episode after you're done listening, you can come talk to me. It's true. It's just me. It's just me on the other side of this screen. And I'd love to hear your thoughts, your opinions, like what is resonating with you about these episodes? So come talk to me. You can find me on Instagram @HeyHeyShawnamay or yeah. HeyHeyShawnamay, I've got a Facebook group called consensual sales. Just look for it on Facebook or you can just check out my website at HeyHeyShawnamay.com.

There's two types of people who hear consensual sales in the first go, Oh, Eww, Shawna, that is not what you want to say. There are better words to use and the second type here, consensual sales and say, you know what? You're right. I don't want to talk my way into the sale. I don't want to memorize a script. You just want to work with clients who are excited to work with you. Now that's consensual sales.

Hello. It's me. Shawna. Danielle had asked a really good question in the group about what do you do when someone connects with you on social media and you're having a hard time keeping the conversation going, and what do you do to keep the ball rolling? And I think the answer might surprise you. And the truth is if I'm being totally honest, I have very, very little patience for people who connect with me, who are just adding me without giving me context or giving me information about why we're connecting.

(01:25): I tried never to do what I wouldn't do offline online. So I would never add somebody to my friend list if I didn't know who they were, or if there was not some type of connection, there has to be a connection for every single person that you're building a relationship with. And so when you're bringing people into your circle, you're building a relationship with them and you got to know how you're connected. So if people add me on social media, I try to be gracious. Cause there's been times where I haven't always been able to connect right off the bat with somebody in private messages after adding them, where am I going with this? If somebody connects with me on social media and they don't say how are connected, how simply send them a message and say, thanks so much for the ad. I'm curious to know how we cross paths.

(02:14): How do we know each other? Most of the time, they don't know. Like they don't remember because they're just like adding random people. And again like that really, really, really kind of upsets me. So what all do is all go through their profile and see if there's anything that I can connect with them on. Like, do I like their energy? Do they seem like an positive, happy person? Do we have anything in common? And the truth is if we don't like, if I just feel like there's nothing here, I will literally unfriend that person. And if you want to keep the line of conversation going, I thought what Alexis said was good in terms of like asking them how they got started with what they did. I thought that was good question, but your conversation has to be relevant. And I'm just like way too busy to just like, shoot the breeze with somebody who like there's no connection with.

(03:10): So I'm not going to force one. I'm not going to force a relationship that's not there. So I don't need to be connected. I don't need to be randomly connected with lots of people. I actually really want to know who's on my timeline. And it bothers me when I see people on my timeline that like, I don't know, like it actually really stresses me out. So what I was trying to say is that when you're talking with somebody who actually has to be relevant, so asking them like what their favorite pizza is when you're just trying to keep a conversation going is not the most relevant. It also means you want to make sure that the level of questions get deeper. So you don't start with like really deep intimate questions. Okay. Those, you have to earn your right to kind of ask. So I just wanted to say that too.

(03:59): Like you're not, you're not getting into somebody to just direct messages and then asking them like, does your dad leave you when you were seven years old? You know, like you don't have to ask really super personal questions. Okay. Oh, okay. Alexis is doing exactly what I told you to do Danielle too. So, okay. So the question here is, I don't know if you guys can see this, the question here is now that I've randomly have a whole bunch of people on my social media account that I really don't know, like, what's my move. Like what do I say? You send them a message and you say, Hey, I've been going through my friend list. And I realized that we actually have never connected. And so I wanted to get to know you a little bit better and notice that you are in the university of Minnesota.

(04:41): We have this mutual friend, we are both business owners. Like I checked out your website, act like a normal person, just like you would online. And Alexis did this. And she ended up having a really great conversation. Great. Okay. And Danielle here saying that she'd offered a call, two people have said yes, and some of them might be thinking that you're going to sell them something. You can tell them that. Jump on the phone with me. I'd love to get to know you a little bit better if I can help you. Great. If not, I'd love to connect with you. Anyway. I think I have a nuance of that script and the Trello board. And you say that to let their guard down, like you're not there to sell them anything on the first call. Okay. So I hope this gives you guys some insight, some thoughts, but like, I'll just delete those people. Like I literally do. I just delete them, but I have just anyway, let me know if you have any questions.

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