Hi there. I'm Jill Allen and this is find your fierce, the show designed for women to discover your fierce, unlock and unstoppable mindset. Build unbreakable courage and completely transform how you show up every single day. Each week I will bring ideas, methods and strategies that will inspire you to step into your greatness and live life on purpose. Let's be fit, fierce and unstoppable.
(00:36): Hey there. Welcome to find your fierce. Love that You are here today. And I'm excited because I got to thinking that we're actually really adding on to these past few weeks. I know we talked a lot about the striving addiction and the impact that it has on our life, which kind of brings us to today's topic, anxiety, or the feeling of anxiousness. And I want to go head to head with the stress and the overwhelm and how we can feel less anxious because I have not met too many women that have not experienced some kind of overwhelming stress or days where they live all frazzled and short fused. I know I was there. I know I've had days like that between the kids, you know, the spouse, the career, the everyday to do's. I mean, it could build up over time and before you know it, you've lost yourself and you may feel slightly anxious.
(01:28): And I don't want to go into the triggers of our anxiety, although that is something we need to face and be able to identify first. And we're going to talk about that in another episode in series, I just want to talk to you or with you about how we can feel less anxious and how I have found ways to cope and respond to all the chaos and our life. And I tell you what the chaos it is bound to show up in our life, the storms, the crazy, the whirlwinds that come barreling through our life. Things that we expect and others that we don't expect that catch us off guard. And we can't always eliminate the stress that is caused by challenging events and circumstances or years like 20, 20, but we can learn to manage it. So it doesn't overwhelm us. And I get it.
(02:16): We ignore the signs. I know we go about our day. We have our blinders on, it just becomes mundane where we show up and we barely survive, but we ignore these signs. We ignore all the triggers and it can be all cumulative and taking us down a path that I know that we don't want to be on and where our peace and our sanity are being snagged or being taken away from us. And I want us to be able to find that rest and that calm in the midst of it. I know a few weeks ago I was at a speaking engagement. Someone had asked me how to balance life. How can you show up feeling less anxious? How can I find that peace? Like, is it even possible? And here's the thing. The number one thing that worked for me was spending time with the Lord because we can map out our days, we can talk about time management.
(03:06): We can talk about solutions. We can talk about bubble bath spa days. The self-help, the next steps, all the tips in the world. But before I go in any further with how to feel less anxious, no, that my number one, that my number one go to is God, not necessarily religion. Not that, let me check off my Bible plan or on my Bible app, but to actually go to him, to lean on him and seek him first, he has been the only one that provides the stillness and the calm and this unexplainable piece that so many of us are searching for. And we don't even realize that we're searching for it. But unfortunately, it's usually the last thing that we use as our go-to or as that solution for us to be able to solve that anxiety problem. Or we don't even realize that he's the answer because we are wanting to fix it.
(04:01): We want to fix everything ourselves. We want to control all that we can control. So no, before I go any further, that that is where my peace comes from. And it's been on a journey. I can't wait to really take you on this journey here in the next upcoming weeks, we're going to dive into that in our just breeze series coming up, but know that that's number one for me. And it has solved so many things. Okay. So now with that being said, I also want to share with you other ways that you can feel less anxious that I found that works for me, call them quick fixes, call it an instant boost, a few things. In addition to having that relationship with the Lord, speaking of the Jess Bree series, funny as I was going to share with you that we need to learn to breathe, and it's not a coincidence that the Geoffrey sisterhood was created.
(04:50): And if you haven't done so already, I hope, or I invite you in to join our Facebook group called Jessica breathe. So head on over there, but I know I needed to breathe. I needed to slow down. I needed to begin working from a place of rest versus working from a frazzled state. So we need to breathe something that we do subconsciously just naturally. So for us to be able to focus on our breathing can seem so senseless to some, okay, I know it did for me, but here's the thing. We actually really need to focus on our breath. What happens when we feel stressed, we take shallow quick breaths. Maybe you don't even realize it, but our breathing becomes faster. What happens when we try to take a big old inhale? I don't know about you, but a few years ago, when I was trying to slow down my breath, it actually caused me more anxiety.
(05:41): It felt like there was this weight that was on my chest. It was a challenge to take that big breath, expanding the lungs, the rib cage without hurting or causing me to panic. But that was exactly what was needed. It was time to down and our breath is linked to our emotions and our emotions are linked to our breath. So if we need to slow down or wanting to feel a sense of calm and some stillness, we learn to just breathe and to focus on that. So let's try it. Okay. So when was the last time you actually turned your focus on the breathing? It's okay. Don't worry if anyone's watching you odds are they need this too, and they may even join you. So I just kind of want to talk you through a couple of breasts that you can do on your own, because sometimes we don't even realize how tense we are and where we carry all this stress and anxiety within our body.
(06:34): Our body becomes so tense. So I just want you to kind of set up straight. Actually you can even be laying down, okay, I'm doing this with you sitting here in my chair, in my closet, and I'm just going to do this with you, but I want you to kind of have that good posture, lengthen that spine a little bit. And I want you to just kind of get in tune with where your jaw is at. Is it tight? Is it clenched? Where are your shoulders? Are they up by your ears or are they down and relaxed resting on that shelf on that top of the rib cage? I know sometimes what happens is my shoulders start creeping up toward my ears and my neck is holding up my shoulders versus my shoulders and neck holding up my head. Does that make sense? So I just want you to become kind of aware of where you're holding that tension in. So let's just drop our shoulders. Okay. Let our arms fall to the side. Expand that chest open, relax the jaw, maybe close your eyes. And I just want you to take a deep breath,
(07:47): Exhale.
(07:52): And here's the thing. I don't care if you go in through the nose, out through the nose and through the nose, out through the mouth, in, through the mouth, out through the mouth, it doesn't matter. We just want to slow things down and focus on our breath, release any tension that we're carrying within our neck or jaw close, those eyes, relax the shoulders. And I just want you to take a deep breath in.
(08:30): I know when I tried to do this a couple of years ago, I was laying on the couch and I couldn't even slow down enough. I know some of you guys right now want to hit pause. You just want to click out of this episode, this broadcast, okay. I totally get it because it might not be your thing. But if we're struggling with taking a few deep breaths in and exhaling guys, that is our sign. That is our clue that we need to slow down a little bit and just breathe. So even though that was so outside my comfort zone and for me to lay there and breathe, I knew it was exactly what I needed and what my body needed, what my mind needed, what my soul needed. And I think the same thing can go for you. I want you to take another big breath in, and I want you to hold it there for just a few seconds up at the top. And then I want you to expand and exhale, open up the rib cage. Let's take a big deep breath in
(09:32): Exhale.
(09:38): This is something that you can do. I think it's pretty like spectacular gift that God gave us, that we have the ability to slow down our breath when we need that rest. Like it was a built in anti anxiety solution for each and every one of us for us to be able to control our breath. Okay. So this is so focused. I just want you to just breathe, take some more time throughout your day and just start incorporating those into your day and opening up, taking that big, deep breath in. So let's shift gears a little bit. I want you to shift your morning routine. So after we kind of like go through that, just breathing shift your morning routine, what is it that you see first thing in the morning? What do you look at? I know that more than 80% of us look at our phones before we even look at our partners or kids in the morning, even a higher percentage of it being the last thing we see before we head to bed.
(10:34): Okay. So the first thing we see in the morning is really, really important. Who gets the winter blahs, the gray skies, the gloomy winter days, the lack of sunshine. It affects our minds. It affects our moods. Look at the news, the social media, it affects our mind, but let's say we make a shift in our morning routine in an intentional shift. And we start to start our day with prayer, some positivity, meditation, something that's going to fuel our minds and fill it up with the peace and the calm. Maybe it's a devotion. Maybe it's a positive quote, inspirational quote, something that allows you to be present and start your day with the fire that fills you up. You feeling less anxious will be the result or the fruit of how you start your day. Number three, create an environment that restores you. What happens when you walk into a spa that instant feeling of calm, think of that smell.
(11:30): You could probably think of it right now. The lavender, the eucalyptus, the sandalwood. You know, I also think about, you know, the candles that I enjoy, that I burn in the home. I love a soft of an LSM. What about the special soaps or the shampoo? What smells do you like? What, what about essential oils? What sense? Calm you think about other aspects of your environment that you can actually create or shift that vibe. It turns it into a calming vibe. Think about what you listened to. Is it worship music in the background? I know I have it going on all day in the kitchen. It's just part of our day. It shifts everyone's mood. I love listening to the calm app or a nature sound app, thunderstorms, water, ocean crickets, soft rain, rain, forest, birds, anything with nature because here's the thing. Nature is by far the best thing ever that has been created and has been gifted to us to help us naturally be still and to feel less anxious.
(12:25): So I encourage you to create an environment that helps calm you and then live within that. Number four. I know we talked a little bit about this before in a prior broadcast, but I can't stress it enough. We have to be thankful. Gratitude and thankfulness is proven to boost our mood. And it isn't just like a buzzword that makes us all feel warm and fuzzy and feel good. It is the real deal. What are you thankful for? Take time daily, to focus on the good, to focus on the wins, to celebrate all the blessings in your life. Take it one step further and show someone how thankful you are for them. Tell them, do something special, personalize it, watch how your mood changes, how you will feel, how your heart will feel. It is such a simple shift that we sometimes it just gets overlooked and then five move.
(13:13): You know, I had to add this one in there. It has been a saving grace for me. I actually got done listening to one of my favorite podcasts while on the bike trainer. And it's a win-win to get the blood pumping the heart rate up again, focusing on my breath while I move instantly. It instantly eases any anxiousness that I may have that I may be feeling getting out in nature. I know we just hiked Clare Creek, that five mile loop the other day, and the crunch of the leaves, the brisk air is slightly elevated. Heart rate, the good conversation, or there were times of quietness not feeling the need to talk, not needing to feel pressured, to talk, to just be there out there and to be still and calm. We want to move to get out of the funk move because we can celebrate our health move to just feel good to release stress, to clear the mind, to become present, to talk with the Lord move.
(14:02): Even when you don't want to move, you'll be glad that you did, but you name it moving can help do so many things. And I know our fit and fierce gang. We move three to four times a week, 20 minutes from home and we show up together. So it doesn't have to be hours in the gym to make a huge impact on our mental, emotional, and physical state. I totally get it all the noise around us and the noise inside of us. When things are swirling around in our mind, it can take a toll. We can usually remove ourselves from the noise that is surrounding us, unless you live in my house. I have to say it is so loud. That is why I am in my closet. That is why I have to become super intentional to making sure that I have some quiet time to recharge.
(14:42): And I encourage you to do the same because we cannot afford to ignore it. And here's the thing, the noise inside of us, that's a different story. And one that I want to continue and expand on in the upcoming series and it needs to be uprooted and replaced with the good stuff I shared with you. Some things today that will help with what is around you or provide maybe some instant relief, your environment to shift your morning routine, to what you see. First thing in the morning, how you start your day with some positivity, creating a soothing environment with your favorite smells, which you hear and listen to throughout the day, what you feed your mind with to shift your focus on what you're thankful for. Moving exercising, getting the lungs working in the course, we have to just breathe to focus on your breath, to slow down enough.
(15:28): And I don't want you to skip this part as simple and old-school, as it sounds, your breath can impact your response to the stressors that pop up in life. I hope that you were able to take away a few things today that will help you feel less anxious. If you want to break free from what's holding you back from walking into your true identity. And you're interested in a small group, mentorship set free and live theaters for 2021. Email me@joeatjoeallencoaching.com and we will connect. And if you have zero energy to focus on yourself and need extra support and accountability for women who know what it's like to juggle crazy busy life, head on over to be fit and fierce and become unstoppable with us heads up on the next episode, we're going to chat about joy and how to live with a heart that is full of it. Thanks so much for joining me today. Please subscribe, share this episode, link on your social media. If you felt encouraged or inspired, as we all know someone that can benefit. And I would love it. If you would give some feedback and review as well, talk with you next time be fit, be fierce, be unstoppable.
(16:35): This is ThePodcastFactory.com.
