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It seems that the whole world is in a state of panic. Right now it’s over the Corona Virus, but this isn’t the first time something like this has happened, and it certainly won’t be the last.

It’s so easy to get swept up in the storm of negative news reports, doom and gloom social media posts, and the panic of empty store shelves. But it doesn’t have to be this way. In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss how to center yourself and keep the proper perspective when it seems that the rest of the world is losing its mind.

Show Highlights Include:

  • This is the secret to maintaining your zen, even when things are falling apart all around you (10:30)
  • To turn a bad situation around, ask yourself this one important question (13:08)
  • The real reason getting prepared when things are going well is the key to your survival (14:11)
  • Take these steps now and you’ll be strong enough to face whatever the future holds (15:15)
  • Do this work on yourself and the hard times will create growth instead of destruction (21:25)
  • Defuse any citation by asking yourself this surprisingly powerful question (24:35)

Ready to co-create the perfect life with your partner? Head over to http://bothonboard.com/ to get your free special report on “7 Game-changers for Highly Effective Entrepreneurial Couples” and level up your life, business, and relationship.

Read Full Transcript

If you're in an environment of fear. If you're in that environment and you haven't prepared the garden of your mind, the weeds are automatic. The garden of your consciousness, the weeds are automatic. So you need to prepare that garden consciously all the time so that when you show up, you just show up as who you are.

Hey, I'm Christy and I'm Ray. And our passion is to inspire entrepreneurial couples to cocreate the life and business of their dreams and enjoy the ride. Together, we built three successful businesses. We have a beautiful three year old daughter and we pride ourselves on living a life by design. And our goal is to help you do the same. Are you ready to take your relationship, your health, and your wealth to the next level? If so, let’s do this.

(00:50): All right. So I guess our last episode we were talking for a little while, didn't record but this one we'll get it. So on this episode we want to talk about a little bit about the Corona virus and what's showing up for us through this, how we're evolving and growing through this and how Christie and I are using it versus having it use us. That's one of the things we want to talk about and a couple of different things that we're doing as it shows up for us. So one of the biggest things that I've been doing as this shows up is I knew that something is coming on and all of a sudden I just try to feel off. It's harder to feel anxiety and fear. And about a couple of weeks ago, I started reading the way of mastery every day and then meditating a few times a day, but really embodying the work, really meditating and really looking to, to, to get into my heart, to get into my body and understand that these emotions that I want, whether it's peace, love, joy abundance, compassion, fearlessness, unlimitedness, the feeling of expansion is only going to come from within.

(01:48): Nothing from even abundance, right? Abundant. I've been doing a lot of work around abundance. Nothing external is going to give me that abundant feeling that I'm looking for. That's all internal. It's the internal abundance that drives the external abundance, right? There's a lot of people that have external abundance but inside still feel poor and ultimately no, no amount of external abundance is going to fill that hole. So we're going to talk about that when we talk about the, you know, the Coronavirus, what's coming up for us together and how we're dealing with it and still looking to bring the best version of ourselves to it and have an us use it to grow and expand versus it use us to drive fear and scarcity and anxiety. Maybe your thoughts.

(02:27): So I think we were, when we were recording, not recording and we were pretend recording a little while ago. One of the things that came up was, was how I'm a little bit more in fear and in just lack, I guess. Then raised for the first time in awhile. Like I feel like he's been more level headed and calm and centered. I, on the other hand, I'm not feeling so great about all this.

(02:56): I'm moving on up. People said the West side, how we do moving on up. It's, it's brought up a lot for me. Especially these last few days. I think that one of the things that came up for me was I was doing some work with my, one of my, with my coach and the kind of resounding theme that kept coming up was keeping the peace. Like I, I, my brain always goes to how do we keep the peace? How do we keep things calm? How do we make sure that everybody's happy? How do we, or how do I really, how do I make like I'm the peacekeeper is basically

(03:28): So what's a, what's also, this is us guys and ladies coaching each other. So we want to bring you into our world of us coaching yourself. So baby, what does that look like when, so what? What is the question you're asking yourself if I could, if you allow me to help you with this of when you say peace, like you've got to keep the peace or how do I keep the peace that will shows up for you?

(03:48): My responsibility to make sure that everything is calm and peaceful and for me it's like I have this I guess gift or this way of, of, of, of me of seeing both sides and being the, the diplomat in most cases and I can see both sides and then I can come to almost like I can, I can be the one that creates the space for there to be diplomacy almost.

(04:13): Especially, no, I'm with you. I'm with you. You're magical at that. But, but don't give me the go. Don't give me the enlightened bullshit. Give me the real gimme. Yeah, give me the real Christie. Like the real Christy that shows up in a third dimensional way. What is she saying? How do I keep like when shit goes sideways, how do I keep, what is she saying? Is she saying

(04:30): The thing is, it is good, like everything is calm. Like I don't want to, I don't want there to be, you know, fights. Are there to be any, any type of drama. Like I just want everything to be chill. Like let's just be chill. And so it just really, it's shed a light on, on how, on how many different ways I do this by like not showing up as my true self just because I feel like it might bother somebody or it might ruffle feathers if I say what I'm really thinking. It's just like the way I show up. It's very, it's like too overly diplomatic. It's, it's almost like, like I, I care about everyone else in all, like the piece, not even everyone else. Like, I don't know, I don't want to sound like a martyr. Like it's not that, it's just more like, I just want everybody to be happy and so that kind of limits me and how I show up and what I say and what I do because I want things to be peaceful.

(05:20): Are you at peace? No. You are. So what I'm, what I'm getting from what you're saying is, and I know you, cause I love you, is as an, and I love that trait about you. And yet sometimes I, I think at times that is, is when you show up and saying, Hey, I want everybody to be at peace to things as I'm allowing you to, as you're allowing me to coach you. One presupposes that I'm not at peace, right? So if everyone's not at peace, then I'm not at peace. Right? So how can I expect the external world to be at peace if I don't have that peace within myself?

(05:49): Well, that's the thing. It's like, I used to think that I was peaceful on that. That's why I wanted everybody else to be peaceful. But now I'm realizing that maybe it's not me being, it's me pretending to be peaceful just to make everybody else happy.

(06:00): Baby. You and I have had the most, you know, guys, we've had the most real talk in the last, yesterday we went into the spa I've found blue and we've had some real transcendent talks. Just real, real, like we both knew it, but none of us was being really authentic and as much as personal evolved and everything else we've done, I think both of us taking time and taking space to meditate and really be at peace within ourselves. Like how can you give the world peace if you're not at peace in the inside? And I think maybe what you had is the illusion of peace in the inside, but really this virus has brought out worry and anxiety and fear. And then the weird thing is your environment has egg that on has has said, okay, let's let's, that's what she wants. Let's give her more of that.

(06:45): Well I think it's, it was, it's just, I mean obviously synchronicity and, and having that epiphany, I think it was Monday or Tuesday that I had that call and then going deep and having, you know, going into the journaling and really understanding like what this means and I'm still working on it. And then also having my nail lady having the the car wash guy, like having all these people talk, family members talk about this, this thing like really emotionally charged and you know, we don't really watch the news but we obviously hear about things like through email and through social media and through family members that know that we don't watch the news. So they give us the information in most cases, but it's like really seen that fear based thing. But also having this epiphany of this whole me wanting everything to be peaceful all the time.

(07:27): And then having this happen, like not, I mean I know I didn't attract this, but like this is just something that's happening in the world, right? It's not Christy base, but how am I showing up? Right? It's just new, it's just something that's happening and then how am I reacting to it? And so for example, yesterday we went to whole foods and it was like six o'clock and it was complete chaos. We had trouble finding parking. We couldn't park the week we walked in and it was lines and lines of people with cart full of stuff per aisle and empty shelves like right. It was just really, and then not just what was happening physically, but the energy in the room was, I couldn't feel the energy. She's walking. He was like, Oh just just go eat. Like let's just go eat at the, at the hub, let's go eat at the hot foods.

(08:13): And I was like, no, we need to get out of here. Like I do not want to be here. I do not, I don't, you should say we can self check out. No, I don't want to self trigger. I want to leave. Like I do not want to be here. So it was the energetic, obviously the physical and the, the lack of peace. Right. It was definitely not a peaceful setting as normally you could feel the fear and anxiety. Right. And so that for me was like showing up to that and then just like wanting to leave. I wanted to get away because I wasn't comfortable there. I don't know if it was the right move or not, but it was just like a really kind of is shed this light on how much, like how, how, what is it like that that's my, that's my, my way of being, right. It's how I show up. It's my, it's my emo of, of saying, okay, well if something's not peaceful and happy and quiet and I can't do anything, it, I'm going to just

(08:56): Not be here. Right. And so seeing that and like how I show up to things like that and how, how that limits me. I think that was really insightful because I don't think I was in fear of that. I just kinda dealt with it differently. Like so what? Like when I was in whole foods guys, I thought like I couldn't deal with it. No, I'm just, I was, I'm vibrating differently so I could like, I don't feel it as much because I'm not at that place. I'm not so close to that place. I just, I could deal with it here and didn't show up for me as much as it showed up for her for the first time in a long time. Like I'm showing loose. Normally this is a switch guys. Oh Zen and you are, it's a great inside baby. I didn't, I didn't realize till now and we're just talking about that.

(09:38): I'm going through that aisle. And the reason I said, Hey baby, let's just find parking. Like I just took the next step without really getting them involved cause my, and I've been working on meditating and keep my energy high and bringing peace, love and joy like me bringing that to whatever it is that the coronavirus or whatever, right. Bringing abundance with me and knowing that I carry all that internal. So I think that for me too is like being, we had just spent a few hours at the, at the, at the spa and then of course who isn't peaceful at the spa. Right? So coming from that environment to then that chaos that really showed up in, in, in, in me and saying, wow, this is the contrast. Right? Like seeing the contrast and seeing how I showed up to like saying, wow, this is not feeling good.

(10:19): Like this feels terrible and not that it's right or wrong to like feel bad in those environments. But just having that awareness of this is how I, I showed up, right? Anybody can be Zen at a spa, but can I be Zen in the middle of the crazy cold foods Isles? And that's huge. And then we went to have dinner at a little spot that we know the chef right and right near there. And then the news was playing and everything's negative. Corona virus, you know, the federal reserve printing money, how the president is going to do this and that. And it was so negative. I made one of the funniest jokes I made. We have someone in our family who, who's a anchor, not an anchor, but you know, she does the weather or whatever. And I go, look what a relief to see her.

(10:56): Just because it was so negative. I was just relieved to see the weather girl tell the weather. I was like, this is like, it was just, and then the weird thing is that a weather girl, she's a meteorologist, she's a meteorologist. So it was just even the news, like just how negative it was an owl. And the weird thing is how, how easy, what are the things, I'm trying to realize how easy fear travels. Like it's just nothing positive. Like, like the positive takes so much more energy the way this is wired. So that's the thing though. It's like what do you do? Do you just shelter? You're like, you can't show, you're not able to, I mean, you could for a little while, which is why, for example, we don't watch the news and we don't, we don't go to places where things are like, we don't drink. Right? There's certain things that we can, we kind of have in our control. That's our choice. And we still need to live in this world. We still need to be a part of society and our community and you know, we send it to go to the grocery store, right? So that's what's reignited

(11:54): In me is something like, okay, yeah, I can be Zen in my room meditating or I can be, you know, super chill when I'm at the spa. But how do I show how I show up to the not so good stuff is where the test is, is where the is where the magic is. Right? Cause the like if you're on a whole bunch of other light that lights easy to shine. And then once I did that work, right, I did, I did some of that thinking and some of that I did, I meditated last night after, you know, after we went to whole foods and had that whole situation that was just chaotic. I did that. And then this morning I got up and I said, okay, I'm going to go do the stuff I need to do. And when I showed up at, at target that I had, I had some stuff to buy and I saw some of the empty shells, like I wasn't as crazy, but it was still very charged and very, you know, fear-based.

(12:42): But I, I was able to show up from a different place and breathe through it. And I think that's where the work is that we get to do in these, you know, this is what we talk about with mindset and with all these things, it's not, you know, pretending like things aren't happening and hiding and, and being, you know, ignorant about these things. It's, it's how do we show up to this? How do we show up to this crazy market, you know, with the stock market going, going bonkers. How do we show up to, you know, things not being stocked in the grocery store as normal. Like how do we show up to that? Yeah. How can we show up differently in a way, right. And not just be the light, but in a way where it just, it doesn't feel so heavy and so, you know, hard, right?

(13:19): Like it's just, it just, it was feeling yesterday. It felt terrible. Like, yeah. And it was like, I don't need to feel this way. Like being clear that, okay, yeah, that happens and we left. Right. Thanks. Thankfully we were able to leave. But this is why we do this work. This is why we do, why we, why we get so clear on, on, on, on our values, on what we like on what makes us happy on like all the, all the foundational stuff. Because when things like this do happen, that's when it's gonna show up

(13:47): Preparing for you for growth. So would you want to do is be doing this work all before so that when this comes as an opportunity for you to grow and expand and really shine your light, not that you weren't shining before, but bring that light to this, right? So not do with what's here, but also how are you being as you deal with it, right? How are you showing up? So that's, that's a great question. Have one of the great things that I learned that I heard recently from Michael Beckwith and you might want to ask yourself this question, angel, is the question is what's trying to emerge here? What's looking to emerge here? So, for example, it talks about a Caterpillar and then the Caterpillar comes up to a wall and you know, the, the the, the failure, Caterpillar says, Oh, I'm not able to do anything, right?

(14:31): I'm going to go back the other way, right? The achiever, Caterpillar tries to comb over the wall. I'm figuring it out. I'm going to beat this wall up and unenlightened caliper Caterpillar would ask, we'll just wait and breathe through it. What's, what's looking to emerge, what's looking to show up here? And from just being there and being in that piece, he's going to get his wings without effort, right? But if he's asking other caterpillars, Hey, well, right, you cannot go ask the other caterpillars, right? You have to go ask the butterfly. But if he doesn't show up with that in that space and then hold space for that, right? You, you, you end up, you end up having the wall use you. So can we be in this place of let's get practical, some of the things that you might, you guys might want to consider doing, meditating, getting into your heart every day, getting into your body.

And really embodying, really living, really experiencing these positive emotions that you want to be. Nothing outside of you is going to give you peace. It's going to give you joy, is going to give you love, is going to give you abundance, is going to give you compassion, is going to give you fearlessness, unlimitedness expansion, all these things that you're looking for. You're the one that Nim to yourself and you can give them to yourself now. So what we're saying is not deal with what's showing up, but deal with what is showing up as your already full whole and complete and embodying these emotions and how you show up will be way different. Let me give you an example of how that actually manifests in reality. I have investors calling me freaking out, Hey Ray, should I buy gold? Should I buy this? Should I buy? What do you think she's going on in the market? Like what should I do? And I go, first of all, you got to get out of fear. The first thing you got to do is handle your own emotions you need you. You may want to consider meditating more, you may want to consider being silent more, getting, getting into yourself more so that you can show up as the highest version of yourself. So for me,

(16:11): Even being with nature, that's what I want to go. Like I'm looking out the window, I'm like, let's go for it.

(16:16): Yeah. Even being at the beach yesterday when we were outside. So, so being in nature, being in silence or both? Ideally both. I mean if you could be in silence and in nature, that's amazing. And just get back into your body, get back into your body, get back into the, into the heart of your soul, get back there.

(16:32): I think one of the things that comes up for me, and I didn't want to forget before you kept on going with the, with the examples is for me what's been working this week especially is I'm not the best at journaling, but I, I've been doing it more and as I'm journaling instead of, cause we, we, we have a lot of these things, especially in personal development and mindset, like the affirmations and the positive talk. And the positive self talk and all, all these positive things. But if the negative is there, then you want to take a look at it like you, you, you aren't able to just ignore it and pretend like it's not happening. Right. So I think that's where I was, I was pretending like nothing. Everything was fine. Everything's good, no worries. Like it's not coming this way. We have enough way it will be okay.

(17:10): And then I went out to whole foods and I'm like, Holy crap, the world is falling. Like the sky is falling. Right. And so finding that balance of saying, okay, you know what? I'm going to look at this, I'm going to look at my fear and we've talked about this in previous episodes, but I'm going to acknowledge it, embrace it, embrace it, and, and sit with it. Right. Which is what I did this morning. Right before I went to whole foods. It was like, I mean when I went, before I went to target, it was what happened at whole foods. Like what was it in me? Like, I think I was just caught off guard maybe, or I just was not in a good place like, right. So it's like if you prepare for it and you can sit with it and you can say, you know what, there's a lot of not good stuff going on in the world. There's, there's people that are sick, there's empty, there's the stock market. Like look at the fear and face it and look and like Ray said, like embrace it and let it out. Right. And say, you know what? I'm not even right now. When Ray said let's have this conversation, then it's recorded. It was like, I don't want to talk about this. Like I'm freaking out over here. Right. And so I'm not freaking out. But

(18:08): Also, so even even for me, even for me, I still look at things from the market and what's going on with gold and crypto. I'm still very attuned with what's going on the market. But before I go onto YouTube, before I go look at the market and what's going on, I get right with myself because again, I can cultivate the garden of my mind. Here's what I've learned. What happens to the outside world if you're in an environment of fear and anxiety, which was, which was the, the, you know the shopping carts at whole foods. If you're in that environment and you haven't prepared the garden of your mind, the weeds are automatic. The garden of your consciousness, the weeds are automatic. So you need to prepare that garden consciously all the time so that when you show up, you just show up as who you are. You show up as light

(18:49): And also like, what is it that you're like, Ray is very, or in the past he was very doomsday. Like he, he, he, he went the opposite direction. He was like, okay, the world is ending. We need to build a bunker. We literally did that in what, 2010 we started building a bunker. We, we, we started to build a bunker. Like we literally will tell a story one day, but we did that and I was thinking, Ray, you're crazy. Like what's wrong? Like everything's fine. And so I'm the opposite. I am the one that everything's sunshine and roses and even when it's not, I'm going to pretend like it is because then it's gonna make everything else go away. And so really having that awareness of where like what kind of person are you? Like are you the one that pretends like everything's fine even though things aren't, which is me more most of the time?

(19:34): Or are you the kind that just really goes all in on the craziness and the, and the fear and the, you know, the world is going to end and we're going to starve to death. Right? Where are you in that spectrum? Or maybe you're somewhere in between and then having that coming from that awareness of, you know what, I am not able to, for me, right? Personally, I'm not able to shelter myself from the stuff I have. We have a a daughter, we have family, we have a business, right? We can't just shelter ourselves and pretend like this, you know, Coronavirus and the stock market stuff is not happening. And we're also not able to like go into that and play like play into that. Right. Play into that fear. Like Ray was saying, like we're not able to do like it's not one or the other.

(20:14): It's finding that marrying that, that unity of both and saying, okay, well this is what's happening and this is how we're going to prepare and before I put on the news because I want to know what's going on in those school system or whatever. I'm going to sit and meditate for a few minutes. I'm going to breathe, I'm going to have some tea. I'm going to be calm before I go pick up my daughter in school. I'm going to, I'm going to make sure that I'm grounded, that I, that I went for a walk in nature that I let go of anything that's not serving me right. Those are the things and having that awareness is where we always talk about the awareness, like be aware where are you, where are you at? Like where if, if something is getting you emotionally charged, take the time to discharge it. Take the time to, to take it apart and pull it apart and ask the questions and really get to a place where you can feel like, okay, I can handle this now

(20:58): Here's that bomb so the bomb comes up. No, I'm asking you now the bomb comes up. Right. Cause they had their, they haven't, they haven't prepped. Someone hasn't prepared to consciousness for the bomb shows up. How do they, before they go out there and go off on a bomb, how do they diffuse cause otherwise the bomb bomb in this case being the coronavirus takes advantage of you. We don't want that to happen. We want you to use it to grow. That's what it's here for. The Corona virus is here for our souls expansion for us to grow. Now we're the, it's either going to use us or we're going to use it. You get to choose that.

(21:28): Well, I think for me it's definitely having, like we said, like that foundational piece of, you know, all of these prior 40 something episodes is getting us, it's doing that kind of work of preparing us for something like this. Right. For example, the market crash. Right. Okay, so where, where are your finances? Where have they been? Have you not been looking at them like what's been going on? Do you see this coming? Like Ray knew this was something like this was coming. He felt it, he knew it. I'm like, how do you know? While I've been reading about it, I've been meditating on it. I've been, okay, so you're prepared for it. And then that awareness of saying, okay, well this bomb is here. Right? And step one is okay, well I'm freaking out. I'm not feeling good. Right. And then from that place then taking the steps you feel like you need to take for yourself.

(22:07): What are, what is that while you would've, if you would've done the prior work you would've known? For me, it's taking a walk. For me, it's breathing. For me it's, it's journaling. Meditating, kind of works me up a little bit more because I'm very in my head. So meditating can work. Maybe like a guided meditation going to get into your body. That's what I'm talking about. Right, but and so what like getting to know yourself at that level where you can diffuse the bomb yourself and if you need help, obviously you ask for help, but like those, those steps are the ones. But the first step is the awareness. If you're not aware of, if you're living in the chaos and you don't even realize that you're in the chaos, it's crabs.

(22:45): I agree with you 1000% if you're not aware that it's showing up, right? That that's that, that that's not how you want to show up. Correct. That. That's level one. How do you start to develop the muscle of awareness? Guys? Meditate. Be with yourself. Go for a walk in nature. Silence, silence the mind. The mind will never give you peace. It's not designed for that.

(23:07): And asking those questions, like asking the questions like for me, like why did I just freak out like that? And whole foods, like, not that it was wrong of us to leave. I think we should have left anyways. Just wasn't a good environment, but it was all the extra stuff that came up where I'm looking at [inaudible], he's crazy. Like he doesn't even see the chaos. He doesn't even feel the anxiety in the air that I could barely breathe in there. I thought

That a little bit, but I was feeling unfold for her. I could feel her anxiety more than anything. But then again, I had meditated that day once before I got to the spa. When I got, when I went to the spa, I went in front of the hour meditation, so I was, and then I went for a walk on the beach. So I was, I was, I was, I was my a what? Christie calls a what does a high flying disc I was, I was on that bad boy. And what's going to show up for gentlemen and women in business, and this is, I have people in my circle, my different groups that I'm in, whether it's borrowers and lenders or are the people in masterminds, they're freaking out and like, Ray, should I do this? Should I do that? I go, where's the opportunity here? But where's your opportunity here is then coming from a place of where is the opportunity here like, Hey, let's let's be in a great place and let's take advantage of material.

(24:11): Where's the opportunity here from a fear place, from a fear of missing out from a fear of of how do I preserve what, like what's going to happen? Like looking at the worst rather than saying how bad can this get? How great can this get? How can I use this versus it using me? What's looking again, the Michael Beckwith question, what's looking to emerge here? Like what's really looking to, to, to what's looking to grow and these negative emotions that show up in us. Sit with them. What's, what's going on. Like release them and them. Forgive yourself for having that negative emotion and gets to what's real. What's real is this is not gonna wipe out humanity. This is not art where mother earth is going and everything else. We have no control. What if, what's showing up here is spirituality. God, whatever you want saying, Hey look, you guys don't control anything.

(24:57): I want to show you how not in control you are so you can let go of the illusion of control and get back to love. We all are the love of the thought of love and form. That's what made us is the thought of love and form. That's all we are. So this idea of the fear and like not can we be okay not knowing. So what's showing up for me and I'm an easily these man meditation is legally is like, can I be okay not knowing what's going to happen? Can I trust my creator? Can I trust the universe? Do I have faith? Right like that. This is gonna. This is, this is gonna. This is going to solve itself. This is going to go away.

(25:30): And not just the goal, I think the goal away, but then also like, like you said, what's, what's emerging here? I think it's how we're showing up and I think that's maybe why yesterday was crazy for me and how this morning I kind of, I shifted and I, and I was like, wait a second, this is not serving me right. This is not good for anyone. And, and coming from that place and building that fortitude of saying, okay, yes there is certain things going on. XYZ is happening, the shelves may be empty. You know, the stock market is not doing well and I get to build my strength up and saying, okay well me freaking out is not going to help. Like there's no, there's no win there. How do I show up at this to this still in reality, right. Still still very aware, but also, and also in a way where it feels good for me in a way where I'm showing up as my butt as my highest self in a way where I'm helping as much as possible, my, you know, situation and letting, like you said, letting the unknown happen because either way there's no control.

(26:35): So do you want to show up in fear and you want to show up and love? That's all you have control over. Hey man, I mean, it's not the easiest thing in the world.

(26:41): That was beautiful. But then again that the fact that it's not easy, that's where the muscle is built. If I can do this here, then I can do this anywhere, right? Cause anyone can do it in their spa when they're everything and the bills are all paid in the markets at all times. Anyone can do it then. But can you do when you get punched in the mouth? And I think that when you get punched in the mouth, if you haven't done the pre-work, if you haven't already been gardening, your gardening, your consciousness, if you're already not emotionally strong, you're going to get knocked out. Now, that doesn't mean you don't get back up again. It's just harder. It's going to feel more intense because you haven't prepared, but it doesn't mean maybe. Maybe it gives you maybe because it knocks you down. It gives you a sign, Hey, get prepared and maybe that's what's emerging.

(27:19): Oh wait, I got knocked down. Maybe annoyed, maybe. Maybe that is what's emerging. Yeah, because in a way in Oh eight when I got, when I went through as in Oh eight I got hit in the mouth. Now I, I've committed my whole life, my being, my, my daughter, my wife. I am not going to show up to that same situation, external event that is neutral the same way I showed up in a week. I'm a completely new person. I'm meditating and really I'm reading, I'm reading my spiritual word daily and I'm actually embodying this meaning. What I mean by embodying is that I bring that highest self version of myself wherever I go and it is the priority of the date is the single most important thing I do is meditate and read and journal on the spiritual side, it's, it governs everything.

(27:59): It is the most important thing and from that place is where I do things. Does do I still get hooked? Yeah, but then I go meditate and I let that go and I embrace it and I just release it and I get back to [inaudible]. Really what I'm sharing with you guys is all these positive emotions that you're looking at in body. You're the ones that give them to you and then can you bring those with you? Can you bring that heart into the new situation and be peace, light and love and joy for yourself and furthers who need that and not only need it, they're inspired by it. I was able to inspire two or three guys who call me freaking out and today sent me pictures of the same books I'm reading and what I mean is the way you were. Then the today is sent me texts.

(28:38): Right. Thank you. I'm so grateful you're in my life because I wasn't a fear place and I, and I stopped doing meditation and I stopped watching my thoughts. I stopped the awareness work and all of a sudden I got hooked by fear, getting hooked by fears, automatic get being in our head is automatic. Can we be in our hearts and can we and can we and can we bring that to where we need to bring it to Reichen and in this way guys, well we're sharing with you and ladies is use the Corona virus to get our crown to grow emotionally, spiritually to, to, to deal with what's emerging here and had the Coronavirus use it to help us grow, expand and serve at a higher level and love at a higher level. Yeah. So one of the other things that emerged lately, yesterday from the actual Coronavirus as we were meditating and left the spa and I wanted to share with you cause was so profound is she hadn't meditated.

(29:25): And I had meditated before we got into whole foods and we had one of the most realest talks that we've ever had in terms of, I don't want that. No, I want that. Yes, no. And then we were like going back and forth and we're like, okay, let me be really, really, really honest with you. You know, if you're ready to talk. And I'd be honest, it kind of means like, well you're relying on the whole time before. Right? But it was, it was just, you know, some things here like, Hey, do we want to do, want to go on this trip? And babe, you know, like where before we were considering it, but we were considering a kind of home hump guys and ladies, it's either a hell yeah or no and really getting to that place and it takes time. It takes, how do we get to that place where even with the couples being both on board, I think that one of the key foundations is authentic communication. And for us, I thought we had it, but then yesterday I went to a whole other level. So how do we help them? And maybe we this in another episode, but how do we help our, our amazing listeners have authentic communication. So as I asked a question, the first National's up paper, I don't think we're authentically communicating to ourselves. Let's start there.

(30:29): I think the first step there would be to get, like, I didn't even know, like I was, I was being honest with you, but it wasn't that I was being dishonest. Like I didn't know. It was like, Oh wow. That's how I feel about that. I didn't realize it. So you weren't aware exactly. It wasn't, I wasn't, or maybe I was, I wasn't letting myself be aware of it. I wasn't letting myself feel that way because it was like, Oh, that's not right. Right. It's not right to not want to go on this trip or it's not right to not want to right now to ourselves. I think so I think it's not even lying. It's, it's not giving ourselves permission to feel the way we feel.

(31:02): Oh wow. Now giving ourselves, so if we're not giving ourself permission, how we feel, really, we're kind of judging it. We're judging how we, cause Oh, I wonder how she'll think or like, am I really allowed to like what crap is that? That's so how do we do? How do we, how do we get our amazing listeners to have a real talk amongst themselves first, like internal and then to really then be open to express it to you because we made some key distinctions. Like yesterday I go, babe, I'm really not happy where I live. She goes, yeah, and I go, what this whole time like, like, no, not that we're unhappy, but we're just,

(31:39): Well I think it's one is getting, getting good with the, that you're able to, you're allowed to change your mind. Like you're allowed to shift and grow and change and, and, and, you know, pick something and then not want it anymore. And that doesn't mean be fickle and, and, and, and

(31:52): No baby. No. Hey, what you're saying angel is, Hey guys and ladies, what worked last season didn't work no more. Look this place up and we love where we live was and I still love it and yet I loved it more.

(32:07): Right. It's just shifting and we're growing. I think being okay with change and meaning being able to be okay. How about embracing it, right? Knowing that it's going to happen, like knowing that that, that things aren't going to stay the same. I think that's why this whole Corona virus has, has really hit me strong cause it was like everything was good. Like we were, everything was going so great. Like why did it stop? Like why did it now there's chaos and I had all these things planned, another not happening. And it's like that's the other part that comes up is like the one was fear based and the other one is things are meant to change. These can't or aren't able, they will not stay the same. And they being the being okay with that and being able to roll with it and, and have that space to, to let that come up and say, you know what, I don't feel this way anymore. Things have shifted. I, I, I've grown. Right. Or I've, I've just, things have changed and now we get to choose something else. Like giving yourself that permission to be okay with that.

(32:59): And I think a couple of action that showed up because we had a talk. Yes. I think a couple of things we agreed on is one, can you be okay with things changing? Like for example, I'll give you an example, a perfect example. I opened up a brokerage account to, to be able to buy some stocks. I thought this was an opportunity to go baby, let's go buy some stocks. And I just hadn't, for whatever reason, the communications had been off with the person opening the account. I'm like, can we force it? You know, can we make it happen? Whatever. And all those time that God has allowed me to open the account, the stock market has been falling more and more and more. So what I took it to mean, it's a sign that he's protecting me. Like he's protecting you. Like, like whatever's happening is also happening for you.

(33:37): But at times I'm like, dude, God is with me. He's, he's like, really? There is no shortage, there is no fear of missing out. So from our talk yesterday, a couple of things when she said, Oh, I'm not happy with where we live. Well I got on the MLS today and I made an offer somewhere else. I'll go babe, I really want to be close to the water and just allowing this stuff to change as we change. W it was, it was amazing for me. We'll, we'll definitely have another episode on this. I want to get my thoughts together on true and honest communication internally and then next and then with your partner and how to create that space and think it's amazing.

(34:09): And I think one, I just wanted to also touch base on our events that we had considered putting on is right now on hold because just things that are a little bit shaky right now and it's not feeling good to plan something when, when there's so many unknown variables. But we definitely want to continue connecting and communicating with you all. So if you have any questions or want to just touch base with us or or connect, definitely keep reaching out. But right now it just feels right to

(34:39): To put things on. Put things on pause, continue doing the podcast, and if you guys want to connect with us, we'd love to connect it with you guys. We love you,

(34:46): We appreciate you. Thank you. Thanks for hanging out with us and listening to the both onboard podcasts. Go to our website@bothonboard.com to receive your free special report on seven game changers for highly effective entrepreneurial couples. You can also connect to us on Facebook and Instagram at both onboard. If you got value from us, please subscribe to our channel and leave an amazing five star reviews so we can help others get on board to cocreate the life and business of the dreams and enjoy the rug. We hope to connect with you soon.

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